CHAOS.

CHAOS...
i call for order.... but who pays heed? None.
chaos in my mind....in my heart. Around me...all around i see....chaos.
confusion...disorder...anarchy.
emotions...thoughts...words....entangled! am still searching for a free end. i need to pull them apart.

CARNIVAL...
lights...sounds...music.....melody lost in the cacophony...
lost is all that were ever pleasant to the ears.
i call out...my voice loses iself in the crowd...
i reach out... but find none to hold.

CARE...
all that i may...
i cry out for order...who pays heed? None.
lost are the sights...sounds...n all...all that were ever pleasant to us.
i care....n so i still stay here, rooted to the spot... not swayed by the disorderly crowd... waiting...for the One.

CHAOS.

I don't understand so much...

I still dont understand the essence of my existance.
Am still unsure as to what my destiny holds for me...
I still dont understand the existing System!
Am still confused and scared of myself...
Do i need to stay quiet?
Do i need to keep my thoughts confined to the darkest corner of my mind?
Do i need to loose myself in the crowd?
Do i need a new identity to survive?
Do i need to supress my emotions to such an extent that my heart ceases to beat?
Do i need to live for someone who, perhaps, doesnt even exist?
If living means changing yourself in accordance with the world around you,
i wish to ask you this
Do i need to live at all?.....